Do you enjoy a good role-play session? Well, I for one think role playing is one of the most powerful tools for arousal, and I am going to share with you why. Keep reading for more tips, tricks and ideas to help spice up your boudoir sessions using fantasy design.
It’s all in your head
Whilst arousal can cause some pretty obvious symptoms in your pants, the brain is almost always the culprit! We humans dip in and out of our imaginations constantly, sometimes not even realising that we are being lulled into a daydream until something interrupts us.
Yes, we go through hundreds if not thousands of imaginary scenarios each week. I like to think of the imagination as a big coping mechanism. Life can get really rather boring, and our minds sometimes act as a diversion, keeping us entertained and amused.
Using this tool for sexual release is one of the most incredible ways to alleviate stress and address those naughty ideas that would likely never take place, or work out well in real life, but are certainly very exciting to entertain.
I think the biggest obstacle here is not allowing yourself to think freely, without judgment. We are always conscious of how we are perceived by others, but in our own minds we can judge ourselves pretty harshly too! This can help us in certain situations, but I think when it comes to fantasies, it can be rather harmful.
Have you ever been on a diet and restricted your calorie intake, only to obsess over food all day until you eventually wolf down that piece of cake? Same thing here. When we suppress our desires, we can obsess over them and sometimes feel guilty for doing so. Whatever your kink, know that everyone has thoughts that they would consider unusual or strange, and don’t realise how common they actually are! I know all too well, as I discuss these with hundreds of clients every week!
Any LDW mistress will be more than happy to tell you that you are certainly not alone and will also be able to talk through your kinks, exploring them with you and advising on ways in which you can learn more about yourself and your sexual desires. Click here to see the list of mistresses available for a session right now!
Fantasy design is what we do at LDW. We spend time getting to know our clients and understanding their specific needs, without judgment. We understand that discussing initmate topics can be challenging. This is why we are all great listeners! We know what questions to ask in order to get you chatting, making you feel comfortable at the same time!
With that being said, it is possible for you to design your own fantasy too! Not only is this a great way to get to know yourself, but it’s puts you in the drivers seat. It’s all about the fun, so have a long hard think about what turns you on and don’t feel embarrassed about exploring those options in your fantasy. This is where creativity can really flourish, so don’t be shy!
Whether you have meticulously mapped out your fantasy role-play from start to finish, or your want a mistress to help work out the finer points, we are always happy to help! We can play along with your pre-designed scenario or assist you in creating one!
Get your partner involved
Incorporating a partner doubles the fun and increases closeness. If you feel like your fantasy is something you can share with your partner, then doing it the right way is important. In an ideal world we would be able to confide in our partners about all things. This isn’t the case in the real world, for many many reasons.
We are emotional beings. We become attached to our partner and the view that we have of them. If you have a very open relationship (communication wise), then that is an excellent starting point. You will still need to think about how much you want to share, depending on the circumstances of course.
For example: You may have a fantasy about being cuckolded. A great way to share this would be to talk with your partner about her past relationships. Encourage her to talk in as much details as she wants. Don’t push too hard if she starts to feel uneasy about the topic. Remember, you are just testing the waters to see her reaction.
If you need some advice on how to gage a potential reaction or how to begin a conversation, then any Mistress at LDW would be happy to chat with you.
Role-play – A Step By Step Guide
Assuming you have already discussed your fantasies with a partner who is willing to give it a shot!
- Fantasy design: Grab a piece of paper and write down all of the aspects you want to include in your role-play. You may have a BDSM fantasy with your partner acting as your Mistress. Identify all of the things that will excite you and make a list!
- Talk it over: Chat to your partner about the overall experience you want to achieve and ensure that you are both on the same page. This is where you can address any awkwardness or reservations. Encourage your partner to speak freely and have their own input!
- An eye for detail: Now you have worked out the general scenario and have discussed it, you may want to be more detailed. For example: do you want a script? Do you have a particular setting in mind? What about clothing and props? All of these need to be explored before you continue. Oh, did I mention – plan a safe word if required!
- Extras: Gather the necessary items for the role-play. If you need to pick up some things from an adult store, now would be a good time to create a list and go shopping.
- Set a date: Select a date that works for both of you. If you need to book a hotel to get away for a weekend, then planning this as early as possible is key.
- Set the scene: So, you’ve planned the role play. Your partner is game. You have bought all the stuff you need and now the day has finally arrived. Assuming you have decided to stay at home I would recommend putting in some effort with the house, especially the boudoir! Make sure the space is clutter free and has a relaxing atmosphere. There is nothing worse than attempting a roleplay in a messy room! Unless mess is part of the scenario of course! 😉
- The build up: Depending on the type of scenario you have planned, there maybe a build up to the actual bedroom fun. Some role plays start out at a bar or in a restaurant for example. Restaurants usually don’t need to be booked too far in advance, but this is something to think about if you want to include this.
- Getting down to it: So, everything is going well so far and now you find yourself in the bedroom acting out your deepest desires. There is inevitably going to be some hiccups as you adjust to your new roles. Try to have fun with it and to stay in character as much as possible. Even if you do end up giggling on occasion.
- Reflection: The night has been and gone. Now it’s time to think about how the experience felt and whether it is something you want to explore again. Take some time to figure out what worked well and what could have been better. If you plan on doing this again, you’ll find it gets better each time.
- Check in: Make sure you spend sometime talking to your partner about what they thought of the experience. Some fantasy types such as BDSM may require Aftercare. Aftercare is important to recalibrate normalcy and is beneficial to the emotional and psychological wellbeing of all involved. I would suggest reading about Sub drop to get a bigger picture of what maybe required.
Fantasy Phone Fun
If the above option isn’t suitable for you, then maybe it’s time to experience how incredibly liberating it is to confide in a Mistress. Here at LWD we are all experienced and skilled in discussing all things kink! Don’t be afraid to reach out and take the first steps to embracing your true nature. Fantasy design is second nature to us, so let’s create something specific to your needs and tastes.
If you would like to book a session with me specifically then you can do so quickly and easily during my scheduled hours. Instructions on how to book a session are displayed on my Schedule page too! If you would like to get to know me a little better before our call, then please feel free to browse my site. My audio page is where you can listen to some free audios and get a feel for my style and my accent. If you like what you see/hear, then I would love to hear from you!
Until then pets,
Ms Ruby XOXO